eye in the sky

COuldn't make it in time to send vicky off yesterday. feel abit sad when she called to say she got to go in before i reached the airport. *sigh* anyway, please study hard girl. we will await for your return next year.

Went to lip's RSN's (Republic of Singapore Navy) 191 squadron family day with jolene and roger along. Unfortunately, i did not bring my digicam along cos i thought no cameras allowed in the base. Dammit. the old man up there did not favour the day either. occasion showers here and there. but still the trip was more enjoyable when we departed from the Changi Naval Base. the feeling was like going to a cruise except the ship is dark in colour. Yesh, plenty of navy personnel brought their families, their gf and their girl friends along. In fact, i was looking at the wrecked ship that collided with a commercial ship early this year. the tragedy that swept singapore and citizens' head onto the papers and news. still feel abit sorry for the family whose daughter's body left unfound.

Ignore the sob story. As we depart, i saw this cargo ship who looked fully loaded travelled at a amazing speed, for i always had this impression that cargo ships travelled very slowly. our destination was at the sea area where we can have a better view of singapore skyline. throughout the journey, we came across this rainspot where you can actually see this pillar of falling rain in a area. imagine a small boat passing below a waterfall. we moved over from the flight deck to the front since there's nothing to see at the back. We were chatting half-way when we saw this group of guys who wore blazers with one with a snow cap, one with black long sleeve. those guys are from MDC ( Music drama Company). MDC is part of SAF for those who didn't know. they are also known as sissy soldiers. Yesh, they are those guys who dance, sing and perform as their part of serving national service. you might think it's abit weird.

qiang: " don't they feel hot?" ( sun was bright and sunny then)

lip:" then they can act suai." ( suai = mandarin term, means suave)

roger: "act stupid lah."

qiang: " maybe we should walk past them and said" don't they feel hot?"

lip: " so that they can act suai."

jolene: " they don't understand what you all saying, they all look potato." (look potato means they only understand english)

all: "whahahahah..."

after a while, we saw them again, but with blazers off exposing their sleeveless singlets..

lip: " wahaha.. they can only act suai in the air-con room with blazers off, outside with blazers on.

all: "whahahahah..."

frankly speaking, the sky above singapore is quite dusty. we saw the blur view of the skyline when touch-down on our destination. the whole event was rather boring. we decided to take short nap at their specialist mess. the nightsky picture you saw above is what i saw last night when we docking back to changi naval base. it was a photoshop edited picture. you can see the whole moon with only the cresent lighted and the rest covered by earth's shadow. plenty of stars last night. i mean it's rather rare to see so many stars on singapore mainland. but i'm sure you can see more, better and spectacular view of stars in other countries.

Unfaithful

xiaoqiang's words: " which hurt more? Betrayal or Deceive? When we say it's all for him/ her, is it really that all for him/ her? Do we really mean our words? sometimes, the other party just won't see it. the question" why he/she just can't sense it?" will revolves in the head. Prolong contradictions in the head will lead to more questions. Instead of finding all answers to one thousand and one questions, we can take the questions one at the time. Just like the time we took our exams papers. question 1(a), then 1(b) and so on. this way, our life will probably be alot easier. Last but not least, this friend of mine is back to Canada. i wished her with my warmest blessing in her studies and her predestined one. in fact i'm quite envy of her. At least she found LOVE. Have you ?"


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singapore true love story - this was something I always want to tell you.... [part 2 out of 2]


also playing Lighthouse Family - We are gonna be


++
Until Si went home. then you would come back to me and gave me a real warm hug. I knew it's not real. you were just consoling me. i chose to deceive myself and tolerated what you had been doing. I did not know how long can I hold on but I tried my best as i could. And soon Si was tired of you. she left you and targetted on others. And I was glad cos I knew you had come back to me again. I did not mind at all what you had done to Si but at least you came back. Then I got a call from Si. it's such a surprise that she asked me out and she said to have a talk with me. I went and met her in Boat Quay; and we had a drink. She came asking me How much I love you and I told her I love you very much. I knew your relationship with her, that's what I told her. this is what Si replied,

"Leave him, he's not worthy of your love, you are a good girl. there are much more better guys than him."

I did not take her words although I knew what she said is right. I wanted no one else except you but you did not know. Vin ever came approaching me umpteen times to leave you to be with him but I rejected straight in his face and even scolded him for being an betrayal of your friendship with him. finally Vin then realised that nothing can change my love for you.

"Lighthouse Family - We are gonna be", that's what you always sang to me. I love the way you sing to me. Even after Si's disappearance relationship between you and me didn't turn out well. you found out that I went out with Si and was angry about what she told me and you even reprimanded me for believing in her words even I told you I didn't. And all I always told you is "I just wish to have your love." You didn't take my words yet continuing to hurt despite all the trust I had given to you and all the forgiveness and tolerance I had bear it because of you. I always thought sunshine will once shine on us again after what happened. Who knows since then I found myself going even deeper. I went to Boat Quay almost every night not with you but with Yao and Sin, where Sin was working in the pub we always go.

Apart from my own cycle of friends she was the only one that could understand what I'm going through. I knew she hurts a lot when she saw me drinking alot and crying along the riverside when i got myself drunk. I'm so sorry that i couldn't make her concentrate on her work. that's the only place I could go. the only place where I could frustrate all my depression and the DJ would always got the song I like.

You knew I went there but u didn't care less. You assume that your buddies would take good care of me when you were not around. things between you and went far down the track and once again you betrayed me. Mel, a girl from another poly. you contacted with her when you went clubbing. another wild animal, your kind of girl to fling on and I hated her voice when she voicemailed you. I could even called her up and give her a f**kin scolding but I didn't. I respected you. I remembered you told me once. you are a scorpio. that how wild you are. you were pissed off with me for "betraying" you just because I went out with Si but you didn't even give me a chance to explain. even I did, i don't think you take it either.

You described yourself as a horse. There are you wanted to run freely on the grassland and there are times when you wanted to be in the stable. If I let you off freely, you go wild but I can't hold you on too tight 'cos the rope to you will snap. But all I have done is all for you. I don't wish to disrupt your circle of friends and entertainment and you blamed me for not 'handling' you properly. Time really gave me a torture and everyday I seemed to lead a lifeless life. How I pinned for a call from you every day and night and how much I wish to have your hug when I saw you. I started to get depression, alcohol is no longer a 'solution' for me not only mentally tortured myself but also physically I would do so.

There were times I would start out crying with no reasons. times when I talked to myself and would frustrate all my anger on my hand. I did not know why I did that... but there's no way i could help it. There's a time when I fainted after arguing with you. My family had a dispute that day and i had thought of calling you to tell you how sad I was. i never expected you actually f**k me off and hung up my call. I cried and I fainted. my parents brought me to the clinic and the doctor was so shocked that and saw the wounds on my hand and even warned me that I might die of hypertension if I can't control my emotions correctly. Still you didn't care. I was in total devastation. I knew I should bear no hope in our relationship. at least I'm glad that you finally did this to lessen my pain.

You started to hide your mobile from me. I knew something was wrong but yet you were still careless and let me get hold of your handphone. I saw Mel's messages and yes I got suspicious this time but I remained silent. Finally, you showed your true colours to me. As usual, you went to Mel's house and from your buddies, they had tried calling you and you were asleep in Mel's house. I tried to calm myself down. I bet you regretted for giving me your email password and I got thru your mail and saw your cousin, Bel's email on how you planned to deceive me and betrayed me, how you were going to two-timer Mel and me. i'm sad for Mel cos she doesn't even know my existence 'cos you had told her you were single

I called you and asked you where you were. You sound sleepy and I heard Mel's voice too. You shouted very loudly and even scolded me to "mind your own business".. You made me given up all hope and I finally decide to leave you for good. Do you remember how you tried to hold me back with all your tears? Boy, it's too late 'cos you have made my love for you turned into hatred. all i want to say now is thank you for letting me feel what it means to love. not every story would have a happy ending

I would never forget this relationship. i occassionally get into a daze, thinking about the happier times we had together. i'd never be able to feel this way about anyone else. i cannot explain why after all the hurt and pain you've caused me..

++

Words get in the way

xiaoqiang's words: " Another story from a friend of mine. how often that you had something to tell someone but you didn't. What is the moment or circumstances that refrain you from doing so? Is it the stangers' stare or your loved one's eyes? or is it the wonderful memories both of you weave together? or the words get in the way? What does it takes to confess something? Courage? Responsibility?
love?

___________________________________________________________________________________
singapore true love story - this was something I always want to tell you.... [part 1 out of 2]

also playing Gloria Estefan - Words Get In The Way

++
we met 4 years ago in our workplace. I was waiting for my O level results. I did not bear any good impression at all, cos you were too playful, and irritating... and my impression of you was as a lame joker and how much I hate you to get out of my sight. Nov 2000, we started off as colleagues... We often had lunch with Vin and Ling and how often you would disturb Ling with ur lame joke. To Vin and me, you and Ling would become a couple but seems that we were wrong.

I remembered the first day I started a 'serious' chat wif you. I broke off with my bf and you came consoling me then. I remembered that was the first time I saw the 'decent' side of you. the way you talked to me. how convincing indeed. Soon we started to be the best pal at work, had lunch together, and times when you would gave me a treat during break time for my hard work etc....

Jan 2001, you dated me out on my birthday and it was the first time ever I saw the smart side of you. the way you dress and presented yourself impressed me a lot. and was so unlike the one I knew during work. We had a fun time with Vin and your buddies and since then we would chat on phone for number of hours. We would talk about our past in school or in relationship and I remember you told me that you had not been with any girlfriends before.

Feb 2001, Valentine's day is the second time you dated me out. We were with Yao and his gf, Sin; they were always the problematic couple in your circle of friends but they were great people, not only friendly but mature too. they always had arguments even with our presence. I remembered we took a walk in Centrepoint and Yao and Sin went somewhere else. we entered a toy shop and I had told you how cute the soft toys were. and you looking at me, asking me if we could be just more than the best pals. I was shocked but nervous too. I knew the answer straight in my heart. "Yes" was what I wanted to tell you but I was playful. i wanted to disturb you so I replied,

"try giving me half an hour more, I will give you my answer then"

And you didn't get my hint at all and not even attentive enough to catch my goofy grin. I supposed that half an hour was hard for you and I could see how tensed up you were, just waiting for my answer.

Half an hour went passed, I pretended that I had forgotten what you had asked me. I was waiting for your second approach at the same time you were waiting for mine. I remembered how much fun I had teasing you but you were so distracted that you couldn't noticed the grin showing on my face. But then, I knew you couldn't wait any more. the second approach you took and asked me,

" so what's the answer?"

I hesitated. I knew you were hoping for the best 'cos you were not confident enough and finally I smiled,

"What answer do you expect me to give you?"

This question shocked you and I knew that you thought it would be a gone case but then before you got over this I gave you another 'blow' ,

"dear~?"

This is what I started to call you, you had both your eyes opened wide and big and did not know what to do. no expression on your face next but then you were shy too and still even made me had a laugh when you asked me if you could have my hand, and how much I wanted to tease you again when I felt the sweat on ur hand. We became an item and Yao and Sin were so happy for you that you 'caught' me and how they congratulated us as if we were married, we could talk all the time, going out with friends or went clubbing and we would tell each other how much we felt that we were the most happiest couple in the world.

for the first time in my life, I was so sure that you would be the one. I was only 16 at then but I knew exactly what I wished to pursue. no one else had brought the happiness and the way you make me feel.. there's no need for us to go restaurants for a romantic dinner. I was contented enough having you cooking one bowl of instant noodles for me. those were the happiest days you brought into my life and I loved you so much.

So happy we were then.

But I think.... I guess... I had too much happiness.

Things started falling apart or perhaps you were tired of me. suddenly what we used to be contented with was not enough for you anymore. from the top of heaven I fell straight into ultimate depths of hell, you no longer loved me. Si is your classmate. not only she's sexy but she's capable of flings. she took you as her target. you did not resist and you couldn't... you fell into her hands.Since then, you often rejected going out with me and would "save" your time and told me that you are going her place to teach her work. I was confused I did not know how to take it but still i trusted you cos I love you too much. I couldn't make myself suspicious of you. Often when you were back from her place. you were so happy and seems to enjoy a lot at her place. From your buddies that include Vin and Yao, they knew the existence of Si and even warned me about her.

I wanted to confront you but I couldn't. the moment I saw your smile, it made me unbearable to confront you and be suspicious of what you were doing. the moment when you started to tell me "I love you" that even made my heart grew weaker. We were not as happy when we went clubbing since Si's appearance. you would choose to dance with her instead of me. and me? I would dance among with your buddies and other guys in the club. I thought that might frustrate you but it didn't work. To get your attention, I would get myself drunk and sitting along by the riverside of Boat Quay. sometimes I really wanted to have a jump down into river. perhaps by then I would be able to leave a place in your heart forever. I didn't. I can't bear to leave my parents alone........

++

to be continued........

rainy sonata

also playing Park Yong Ha - I Love You So Much

1st day of work is never be a good experience for all. i really appreciated jeremy and both Yian's & Kiat's(both bosses of Cheesecake Cafe) patience and guidance with me. A straight 2 hours of familiarising the menu, layout, routines when a customer arrives, and greetings. and the real show starts when one by one came in. perhaps it's my 1st day, perhaps it's me who stayed in a dull, monotoneus army that moulds me in talking, tensely, stiff to the customers. This wasn't me when i handled customers in the past. and sure the old man up there played me out when it rained last night. still tomorrow, i continued to strive for better service and better interaction with customers. yes i am working tomorrow. Come and laugh at me if you want to. 'cos this is the most appopriate time that i can entertain you people with my stiff posture and monotoneous speech. Come and wail to my bosses if i offended you, teased you or hurt you before. This is your best shot with guaranteed homerun. You don't get xiaoqiang to serve you people all the time, for all he did was being mean, teasy, nasty, crappy and did what he does best. Stand and block the way or the view.


qoute from gerry's xanga post:

Do people who share exceedingly similar personalities last? Or do people who are vastly different do better? I’ve no answer to that. I’m a walking contradiction, the kind of person who shares similar views with so many people, yet at the same time, there’s something about me that’s always inherently different. Could it be the same with everyone or am I merely being melodramatic, feeling as if I were everyone’s friend and not at the same time. But I have digressed…

click [here] to read gerry's full post.

++ xiaoqiang's words: " Once a girl told me she likes her bf very much, and he's perfect. for a moment, i was happy for her that she is deeply in love with her bf. and glad she found someone she really likes. but after some thoughts,i noticed something amiss. She could be blinded by his strength which totally concealed his weakness. how can a person be perfect? or she hasn't know him that well? but then again was it wrong to fall in love deeply? a relationship bound to fail if one fails to see his/her partner's flaws. a relationship bound to rocks if one couldn't accept his/her flaws. "++

Strangers in the night

xiaoqiang's words: "this is another love story of my friend, which rose from the net. every since internet was introduced into our era; it has claimed its existence in our lifes. likewise for handphones and chat relays. i decided to leave the story below unedited and untouch, although it's abit long for short stories. i thought a simple cut & paste service of mine will leave sweet feelings of a little girl when she pen it down. i hope you don't mind the grammars and vocabularies".


"Love is a great beautifier."
-Louisa May Alcott-

"A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears."
-Woodrow Wyatt-


"Love is a canvas furnished by Nature and embroidered by imagination"
-Voltaire-
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singapore true love story - A love story that sprung in virtual space between two complete strangers in the night.. [part 3of 3]



also playing Frank Sinatra - Strangers in the night


it's L calling... oh no! (my heart beat getting faster and faster) i slowly pick up e call and said "hellooo..." he said "hee, i saw you liao.. you were wearing a blue t-shirt" and i replied "huh?? where you saw me??? why i dint saw you?? dont scare me leh...." (in mind, i was thinking that his height is 1.85 tall.. i should have saw him mah.. he's so tall and i saw his pic before.. why i dint leh.. aiya, i wear so casual and simple.. sigh so paiseh liao..) my eyes still looking around finding tall guy... while talking with him over e phone, i walk toward mrt station.. and hoping to leave e place once... cos i was he spotted me and i dint... when i standing to wait for train... suddenly a guy very tall walk toward me.. i ask him over e phone.. "is that you walking towards me?" he said "yeah, dont walk so fast.. i can't catch you" (aiyo, i nearly cry out) after he heard my voice abit strange then he stop walking toward me.. then he ask me "why you scare of me? am really that scary??" i replied "no.. no... its me not prepared" (glad he's understanding) he said" sorry, if scared you just now.. btw, have you done e thing which you purpose to do ?" i replied"no, cos i came here abit late and e place close liao.. i think i've to come back tmr..." then he said "aiyo, tmr if you come in e morning, i can accompany you if want to, just let me know... i can bring you go eat breakfast also mah" i replied" ok, see how"

after i had my dinner, i log on irc. then as usually i chat with L again.. he said want to accompany me tmr... dont know why i say ok will meet him tmr for breakfast and he'll company do e thing i purpose to do today..

5th of feb, i meet him 8.30am at e same place he saw me yesterday.. after i finished doing e things for my sister... i still never saw him.. sigh he's late... after waiting awhile.. he came and say sorry to me.. then he bring me to a mac to eat breakfast.. he ask me " what do you like for breakfast?" i replied him " hee, whats do you think" he said "wait me here, i know what to get for you" after he bought e foods.. he really bought my fav "big breakfast meal" =) while i was eating, his eyes kept looking at me.. i was so shy that i eat slowly.. i told him not to look to at me but he dint listen.. in e end, i dint finish my foods..

after breakfast, we went for a walk... i still dont dare to see him while we chatting.. and i know that he've seeing me e whole morning... when its about 12pm, he told me he've a lesson later cant accompany me liao.. i was so sad after i hearing he's leaving.. no choice, so accompany him take a bus to his poly.. in e bus, we sit in e upper deck behind last row seats.. we chat happily... he said my fingernails very beautiful.. and ask him to show him clearly... then i said "your fingernails also very nice mah... like gals... heehee" then he say i very naughty.. then we start to play our hands... his hands palm really very big.. cos he play got play basketball one.. then i show him my hands also... and that was e first we touched each other hands.. after that i quickly keep my hands.. (hee, cos i was too shy)

happy times really goes very fast, next bus stop he've to alight liao... sigh, really cant bear it.. before he left he said" i'll call you later, bye" then i replied"you go loh, dont come back hor" he was blur and say "huh??" then i say "nothing, faster go if not you've to alight at next bus stop liao" after he alighted, he see up e upper deck n pretend that i'm not seeing him.. after that i received a sms from him... as usual those mushy sms.. i really enjoy e short morning with him...

then as usual when he go home, he call me.. and we talk about e things happened in e morning.. e way he chat with me still like last time before we met...

6th of feb, as usual he call... i felt there's something bad going to happen.. he seem like something want to tell me but he dont dare to say it out... i asked him why but dont say.. i've a feeling he want to stop e relationship(althought we dint start it but we know we've that feel for each other.. as i want it to start valentine's day.. special day mah) sigh, i play a sad song... and i ask him.. "er, issit... you.. want to.... er.. e song i play now?" he replied"er... ya...." (e song i played a "break up" song" when he said that... i cry over e phone.. he know but he dont dare to say any words.. after awhile, i ask him "why must you do this do me?" he said" feeling lost.. sorry" after i heard it... my mind went blank.. dont know what to do... i thought he's different from other guys.. and i never thought he's also another jerk!~ then i hung e phone without saying bye.... after e call, he ask me to dl su yong kang's sorry listen.. he left me this song only...

from that onwards, he never call/sms anymore.. when valentine's day... i'm at home alone.. he dint bother call and cares for me anymore.. and i dint watch "Marry A Rich Man"... when march 1wk holiday, i dint go tour also... sighz~~ he's really dont want me liao..

so sad.. till now i still cannot forget him...
and i dint tell him i loving him still..
++

please refer the the post on 25 August 2003 if you have no idea what's going on.

Love feels no burden, thinks nothing of trouble,
attempts what is above its strength, pleads no excuse of impossibility...

It is therefore able to undertake all things, and it completes many things,
and warrants them to take effect, where he who does not love would faint and lie down.

Love is watchful and sleeping, slumbereth not.Though weary, it is not tired;
though pressed, it is not straitened;though alarmed, it is not confounded...

- Thomas A. Kempis -

singapore true love story - A love story that sprung in virtual space between two complete strangers in the night.. [part 2 of 3]



also playing Frank Sinatra - Strangers in the night

++
after chatting with him, i realise that its not so diffcult to talk over e phone with him... and i found he really no gal in his mind.. i've think too much liao.. since that day onward, we start to chat over phone everyday.. when he wake up e morning, first thing he'll sms me.. after wash up he'll call me using his hp while taking bus to poly.. then about to start lesson he'll hung my phone and say "i'll call you when i having break time".. after a few hours, he really call me and chat over e phone awhile. before he end e call he said "i'll call you once i can go home.. so wait my call" (he know i am at home very bore nothing to do, so whenever he's free... no matter he's outside, sch or at home he'll call me) ard 5pm he call me, saying he can go home and chat with me over e phone for longer time liao and i wont be so bore.. i was so happy he cares for me... while he's in bus i always want him to say some mushy words to me.. hee hee... he always say it softly.. cos he scare
people might heard it.. and felt paiseh.. but i always bully him say i cant hear it... then he'll say it louder... =p he's so cute....after he reached home, i'll ask him, go take a bath then take dinner before he can call me.. if i dint say so... he'll forget to bath and eat just to talk to me... after he taken his bath, we'll start chatting again..

sometime we'll irc and chat over e phone as e same time.. we really have many things to say.. no ending topic ~~ we not play irc... we do play online game likes, diablo, cs... we're really a pair... what we do and what we think really e same!!as time goes by... i can feel that he love me and i love him too.. he asked a few times to be his gf over e phone and i always rejected him.. its bcos he never seen me before... i afraid he'll regret.. and i'll get hurts again.... that's time i wanted give up and stop talking with him.. he told me not to give up, trust him.. he's different from other guys... he wont hurt me.. sighz~~ after heard he saying those.. my mind changed.. continue to love him deep deep...

one day he told me that he wish to celeb christmas this yr with me (dec 2001) and want to buy me present.. i told him not to waste $$ as no need anything.. and i told him i can't meet him.. cos i've to look after my grandma... he said he'll come over and accompany me to look after my grandma.. i know he wants to celeb christmas with me.. cos i told him before that i dint celeb christmas before with anyone i love before... i dont know what reason and i reject him to come and accompany me.. on e x'mas night (24/12/01), he dint go out with fren... staying at home chatting over e phone with me while i look after my grandma.. over e phone, i told him that i'll meet next yr valentine's day.. he said its so long to see me... i told him that on that day is a special day, you can ask special question mah.. right.. he ans me happily... "ya.. so what u like for valentine's day present.. cannot say no need or dont want ah" then i told him i love surprise... then he said know what to get for me on valentine day.. after that, i ask him whether want to exchange photo before we meet... he told he dont take pic.. then i ask him go take neo card bcos of me...

e next day, he really go take neo card and send to me... while i still finding e most prettier pic of mine.. after i found it, i send to him also...e day after, we received both of our photo... when he saw my pic, he call me hp happily and said"aiyo, you where got ugly.. so cute leh... just like what i thought" (hee, i've no confindent so i say i super ugly to him very time loh) then he ask me"hee, saw my pic liao right.. ugly... u regret liao right?" (at first i wanted play a joke with him, saying he very ugly and i dont want talk to him anymore... )suddenly i've second line, my best fren called(she call me just want to want to know hows L looks like) then i dint ans his question and said "call you later, bye" then i hung his phone... e way i said, he comfirm thinks i mind his looks.. and very sad..after chatting over e phone with my best fren, it has passed 2hrs.. i thought he'll call me but he dint.. althought i say i'll call him later... but last time he'll call me back after a hr if i dint call back... after awhile, i decided to call back.. hee, i pretend that i no mood talking with him... he feel that there's something wrong.. and he tell me that he knows he's not good looking and i've regretted... and i dont need to say sorry to him.. he can understand.. while he's talking sadly... i cannot tahan and laugh over e phone.. he's so blur... then i tell him that i was kidding with him... and i tell him that "hee, dont forget we've a date on valentine's day" now then he know that i dint change my mind.. and our love become deeper...

as time goes by... we still e same chat over e phone everyday.. play online games...

on 31th of jan 2002, he sent me a love letter... it was so sweet and touching when receive a love letter from someone you love.. inside e letter, have some words i'll never forget..he said "WO SHI ZHEN DE ZHEN DE HEN AI NI"... and trust him..althought just a few months, we've chat lot of things.. our past... our plan in future.. and he'll take me go tour on mar 2002 (e 1wk holiday in march) and we even decide what to do on valentine day... this's his first time celeb valentine's day.. and he promise to watch a movie title "Marry A Rich Man" by Sammi Cheng & Richie Ren..

on 4th of feb, abt 4plus... i've to go a place to help my sister do something.. i told him i'll be there... he said he'll be there too.. i told him that we've another 10days and we'll meet up... why so "gan chiong".. he replied no la... just see see only.. while i reach e place, i kept on looking around and wonder will i saw him anot... e more i think e more i scare.. i told myself calm down and go do e things that i promised to help my sis.. just then realise i'm late... guess i've to come back tmr earlier.

suddenly, my hp rings..........
++

to be continued...

upon demands, i chop the lengthy story into 3 parts. sorry to make ur eyes sores.

xiaoqiang's words: "this is another love story of my friend, which rose from the net. every since internet was introduced into our era; it has claimed its existence in our lifes. likewise for handphones and chat relays. i decided to leave the story below unedited and untouch, although it's abit long for short stories. i thought a simple cut & paste service of mine will leave sweet feelings of a little girl when she pen it down. i hope you don't mind the grammars and vocabularies".

Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.
- John Lyly -

singapore true love story - A love story that sprung in virtual space between two complete strangers in the night.. [part 1 of 3]



also playing Frank Sinatra - Strangers in the night

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since i started study in sec sch till before i know L on sept 2001. i knew a few guys, they all say love me, take care of me forever and promise me alot of things but all end up break e promises that they had make. all lie to me and make lost trust on guys.. sighz =(

one night i cant sleep so went irc find people to chat... i happen to join a channel, and get to know some gals younger than me.. they're so nice and friendly... and i start to chat with them in e main for a few hours and dint notice e rest of e peoples in e channel, included L.. from that night onward, whenever its night time i'll log in irc and find those gals chat...

after a few days, L noticed me... he pm and ask me "hi, are you busy?" and that moment onward... i'll just chat with him only.. while we were chatting, i felt that we seem like knew each other long long ago.. i really enjoy chatting with him in irc... he really know how to make me happy and laugh.. =)

since that night onward, i seldom chat in e main with those gals and L will always pm me when i online.. after few weeks chatting with L, i know he's younger than me by 2 yrs old (he's 18 and i 20)... and study in poly 1st yr. no gf and dint love any gal before. he even asked my nos, cos sometime i dint online he could sms me.. he even tried to call me but i'm too shy to pick up e call... =p so sometime i'll pick up e call and hear his voice and i wont talk... i know i very rude.. i thought after a few calls, if i dont talk... he'll angry.. but he didnt! he still can speak nicely over e phone told me not to paiseh, just treat that we chat in irc and feel normal... hee hee... but i still dont have courage to speak up.. sigh...

one fine day, my best fren called me and ask me out for chat.. when i saw her and tell her about everything happened on me in e past weeks... i told her that i can feel that L is a very nice guy.. then my fren tease me say i fell in love with a guy younger than me.. and laugh say that "dont know who say like "older" guys hor..." (i told her before i'll never like/love guy younger than me.. cos people will say i "gao JIE DI LIAN" ") from that moment then i realised i've a crush on L liao... after meeting up my fren, i went back home and log in irc while i go bath... after bath, i saw a pm from L.. and we start our chatting again... after few hours he gonna sleep and he say sorry that couldn't chat with me cos he've to wake early in

morning.. i told him its alright... but he kept saying sorry that cannot accompany me and promise will chat with me longer tmr night... i told him its really ok with me and go sleep.. after awhile he really guai guai go sleep *wink* after he went bed, i check e main got any new topic.. i dint saw any new topic but i saw L quit msg.. it written han yu pin ying... oh my! its saying he miss a gal named, hui something something.. sob sob... my heart like tearing apart.. so pain so pain.. i wanted to call him and ask who's e gal named hui but i dint... cos i know he need to wake up early tmr.. so i dint disturb him and went bed sadly..

the next day, i as usually meet my best fren and tell her that i think L is a liar also.. i told her everything i saw
yesterday night.. she told me there must be a misunderstanding... and told me to ask him over e phone clearly.. (die.. call him? sigh i dont dare... how how...) suddenly my fren grab my phone and said "if you dont dare to call, i'll call him on behalf of you" i told my fren "if you want to, call loh.. i dont scare... haha" (i know my fren type, she's also very shy one..) after awhile she said "hello, do you know who i am?" (i thought she was kidding with me then i shout n scream "dont play le la, i know you wont call L one" then i heard) she said "hee hee.. i'm not e gal la... e one shouting n screaming is e gal la!" after i heard she said that, i can comfirm that she's not playing with me.. i felt so paiseh dont know what to do and say... standing there gon gon... then my fren passed me e phone and i heard L laughing at me over e phone saying "heehee,
i heard somebody's voice liao loh... so cute one" that time my beating very fast.. i nearly cried... since he've heard my voice.. i've no choice and say "hi" over e phone... while my playful fren beside me still laughing at me.. saying my face like an "red apple" oh my! L heard it over e phone and tease me again... (in mind, i was thinking a topic to talk with him.. if not i'll be very paiseh n paiseh... suddenly i remember e purpose why my fren will call him) then i start serious talk with him

me: L, i've something to ask you..
L : yeah?
me: er.. yesterday after u log off ur irc, i saw ur quit msg... er...
L : then... whats you wanna ask... just ask loh
me: er.. who's e gal named hui something something ?
L : huh? got a gal named hui meh?
me: no meh? last night your quit msg leh... (suddenly feel very sad.. feel that he trying to lie or hide something from me)
L : OH... i know what u saying liao.. that's one of wang li hon's song la.. its his new song...
me: (i keep quiet over e phone and think e words he put it as quit msg last night.. and i sing it in heart... oh no! its really wang li hon's new song..) hee hee.. ya... at first i thought you've gal in your mind... sorry mistaken you..
L : aiyo.. i thought you angry me what... scared me you know ?
me: sorry..
L : nvm la.. er, just now that gal is your best fren who you always tell me bout her ?
me: hee hee.. ya...
L : guess you're outside chatting with her.. go chat with her and we'll see each other in irc later k
me: okay.. bye bye
L : bye bye...

++

to be continued.....

DOWN WITH LOVE

Saw "Down with Love" last night with Vincent & Mei, Ronald, Dickson and ALex. The movie is about a story, set in New York City in 1963, of a budding romance between womanizing journalist and playboy Catcher Block (McGregor), cleverly described as a "man's man, ladies' man, man about town", and a strident feminist advice columnist, Barbara Novak (Zellweger), who finds her own rules of love contradicted by her attraction to the cad. Good plot. and it really shows how much a women would do to get her man's attention. Or maybe it might have justify that women( generally) are ruled by emotions ie. love? drop a comment if you have a word or two to say.

Anyway, you might have seen comments made by mei. Yes, i am working part-time waitering now at "The CheeseCake Cafe" . It's located at near Siglap Centre. ask me for the exact address. I haven't gotten my working hours yet but i let u guys know when it is ready. come pop by lor. the ambience quite nice with combination of brown and yellow. See if i can take a picture of it next time.

i feel damn sick today. Not because i am sick but the weather nearly drown me. It's was bright and shine when i packed my stuff to go swimming. Then i went to cook my lunch when the skies just darken so quickly. The next thing you saw was that your neighbourhood getting grey and wet. ARgh~ sianz~("!) what's with the weather recently?

[xiaoqiang love noticeboard]

there is no reoccurrence for time and words.
for you can only face today with a smile.

T W I S T E R

Went to adrian's dinner last night. Just some charity dinner. The whole dinner felt like another post national day thingy after so many flags hung at the sides of the tent and a national anthem before the dinner starts. Actually had to thank matilda for inviting us. It's quite a pity for her 'cos she bid for a painting of shaolin temple when somebody outbid her in a while. Worse of all is someone actually bid a painting of pulau ubin for $8023. duh~ i just don't understand. And i actually met jacqui and colin who are also in friendster too. sooner or later i guess there will be a friendster outing. whaahhah. Went zouk after much consideration. Gotten to return jon's card anyway. I figured i will go haywire and wire twisted if i shut myself at home for too long while jobless. my brain will running out of juices if i've just swim and play tennis and completely no quality production for the week. got a few part-time on hands though.

the picture above is real and it's taken about a month or 2 back. where a water sprout a.k.a. as a natural phenomenon occurs in singapore waters. Not to worry, it only cause damages to those on waters.

Catch me if you can

Added a new flash website, [boombastick], under " sites " at the side.

Recently there's this thing which RIAA is now targetting on individuals sharing files illegally. click on the [LINK] to read on more. So guys take care if you insist on pushing your luck on using bit torrent or kazaa or whichever P2P sharing software. i'm here to spread the news. *sob sob*

today is my 2nd day of being a civilian after 2½ years and also 2nd day being jobless. Hah~ probably browsing thru today's recruit and classifieds. Met up with Roger and gang yesterday evening for a kopi at Suntec's Olio Dome. I still like friday's crowd. Dunno why i just felt that i'm in the correct time and space. But then again, i wasn't feeling the same way in the afternoon. i was swimming and i saw this blanket of feathery clouds over me. yes, friday afternoon was a sunny day. the clouds was like the waves at the sea. i was just dazing ,staring at the clouds. And it's the same old feeling from 2 years back came gushing in my mind. i was feeling very upset for not making to OCS due to injury. this time is i felt crippled from the phase of military to civilian. i don't just understand. but i am not accepting this fact.

i wasn't picky about the jobscope, wasn't picky about the payroll, wasn't even picky about the location. i'm just PICKY about the route of advancements. where i can advance or upgrade myself from working. i just don't wanna slog myself from 9-5 on weekdays. home->work->home. this is defnitely not the lifestyle i want.i dunno about the rest of the s'poreans' mindset. i'm still young. YOUNG! Frankly speaking, i think it's a privilege now to say " i am stress from studying" when you are 23 or older. It's kind of sacred word or phrase. So to my fellow friends who are still studying or left with one year before you received the golden paper which equals to the entry to real world. enjoy while you can.

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Petals and Seeds

also playing Patty Smith - Sometimes love just ain't enough

lay a rose in your palm
Said "I LOVE YOU" very calm
The petals fell very fast
You broke my heart at the very last

I cried myself to sleep all night
Until it reached the sun so bright
You never once said you cared
And I just noticed, you never even dared

My heart has broken so bad
I'm not saying I'm that mad
Everyone had hurt me so badly
That I went home so sadly

And soon it ended
With something I never intended
I took a pill and never woke
Even when somebody poked

I cried so loud up in heaven
When I saw no one cared not even seven
I'm glad my life is over now
So I can never make that silly vow

From now on the petals can bleed
Cause I will never grow that seed

Isle Indulge

Added a new game website, logicfalls, under " playground " at the side.

People, from today onwards, you all shall address me as MR Xiaoqiang. today is my last day to national slavery. Gotten my pink ic, that's it. I was feeling like nothing. you know how long i waited for this day to come, how yearning, how wishful. But today was just like another day. I don't feel the release. Maybe it's the air. Maybe it's the money. Maybe it's the weather. Maybe it's singapore. or maybe it's ...me. in fact i was abit sad. i didn't met up with ASL after the promising to call her *sigh~*. And i saw the least expected person at Taka last night. Went to " the Jazz at South Bridge" with Jeremy & Gerry(she asked me to correct her name) and one of their friend, Ah Hai; for a live jazzy night with CHEROKEE from indonesia.

Yesterday was another HOT day. Went back camp to do the last bit of documentation stuff. Met up with Zihui and Michelle since they are just next door, SIM. okie, guys, i mean real boys. take note. SIM is a nunnery. if you close both eyes, take a stone and throw. you bound to hit a girl. This Maju camp and SIM reminds me of St Patrick and Katong Convent off marine parade in the east. Maju camp, plentyful of guys counting down their days to ord. Girls next door at SIM striving hard to get a degree. St Patrick and Katong Convent are separated by a road yet link with " the bridge of love". Maju camp and SIM are separated by a stretch of fence linked with multiple buses of love. but usually girls are quite turned off by uniformed guys on the bus.<-- you can ask dickson to verify this. Supposed to visit Gerry(wahahha kana food poisoning) at her place( also nearby) but ended up having lunch with her at Holland V. Poor girl~ (wahahah) had to work even when she's sick.

Had a game of tennis on mon afternoon with Gerry plus a game of pool in th evening with alex and sarah after meeting up jeremy n kel. btw, that's linda on the top left, pretending to study. good luck to ur exams, girl. On tues afternoon, i was listening to radio. there's this thing about kids' character determine by how high they lived. Kids who lived at higher floors are firm, less active and less participating. For kids who lived at the lower floors are more active, playful and careless. i can't say this for sure 'cos it doesn't reflect on me that much. currently i'm living at 19th storey but i lived a in a kampong when i was much younger, say 1 to 4 yrs old. what do you think? Meet up with nigel on tues night for kopi at bugis. Didn't really catch "the Medallion", 'cos i got no one to watch it with me. Had really a long talk with him. Guys, below is Uncle Nigel's word to you all.

Uncle Nigel: " qiang, help me send my regards to those i know. Tell them you can have fun, you can be lovely, but without money you definitely earn suffering. Clubbing brings you nothing.. Working gives you something... Success is fulfilment. Career needs commitment.."

Met up with vicky the other day too. the picture with her n me inside is just some fun edit-ion. Saw jeremy's recent post. Quite a interesting topic 'cos it concerns me from today onwards. something on foreign talent bla bla bla.. go comment at his post if u want too. He welcomes all comments.

quote from jeremy's post:

"I sometimes don't see the validity of the arguments either. 2 kinds of foreign workers, one's the blue collar sort, or the hard labourers. I don't see S'poreans rushing to grab those jobs. Or if they do want them, how do they expect companies to pay them the wages they demand, when these companies can pay less for more? The reasons for the work our people put in, as well as foreign workers, are purely mercenary. For the money. And that being said, the companies have to be as mercenary to earn a profit today. It's a mutual relationship. I use you, you use me. You're no use to me because you cost too much, why you? Say what you like about loyalties and providing for our own, but so many employees themselves have jumped ship to higher pays, when times were good. We preach the free market economy when it works...................."

click [here] to go to his page for more.

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[xiaoqiang words to ladies]
Set flirtious men free instead of awaits for their return.

[xiaoqiang words to men]
not all men foots the bill; and it wasn't a talent to be a flirt.
when realised true love is lost, time is already drained.

Absolut Bak Ku Teh

[xiaoqiang words to ladies]
Man also can't resist intellectual women who look daze .

[xiaoqiang words to man]
Humour is the another fatal attraction to women besides looks and wealth.

suppose to play tennis yesterday morning. but cancelled it due to the stupid rain. This is just the wet week for me, no outdoor activites for almost the whole week. Eventhough, i was swept together with the rest of jobless singaporeans mood. i was glad that at least one of my friends is still doing well, at least. Met Angeline Peh at No.5, a bar cum pub place somewhere near Orchard Emerald. She's still chubby, happy and living happily under her bf arms of care. Went to Adrian n Michelle party at one of Adrian's spare house at Holland Rd( i think) last night. Though i don't gamble, but i had a good game of majong with Hai Liang, Eng Tat and Daniel. The stakes was that the loser with the least chips is suppose to get the hp number from one of the girls in the house. Everybody was in high mood until i won one game of 6 "tai". Last game ends at North phase which all 3 were in pushing one another to take the phone number. Until they decided to have " the last game" which the loser with the smallest card to take the girl number. It was me lor. Well, i didn't take. Don't ask me why.

oh~ Did i mention there were 4 tables of mahjong going on in one room? Well, there's one specifically a table of potential, young tai-tais. We decided to go off 'cos Daniel wanted to leave earlier. The tai-tais was leaving too except they need help to carry the tables back. i offered to carry back to their car, not to mention it's still pouring( for the whole night).

Saturday night ended with a bak ku teh supper at Balestier Road. i know it feels good to have something warm and nice to eat when the weather is cold.^_^ don't envy.

Extra! Extra!

Saw the the show " the League of Extraordinary Man". It's really a good story. Deserve my vote with lesser special effects, better story line and better plot. I only knew 4 out of 6 characters. Adventurer Allan Quartermain, Captain Nemo think is from "20 000 leagues under the sea", Dracula vampiress Mina Harker from "Dracula", invisible man Rodney Skinner from ? , American secret service agent Tom Sawyer , Dorian Gray the immortal ?, and Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. you guys MUST really catch it.

Did nothing today. Except typing, typing and re-typing my resume. Keep thinking something is amiss.

Saw the news earlier on. arguement of the MRT stations along North East Line still on. "Why not reduce the price if there 1 or 2 stations not utilised?" bla bla bla.. I was re-assuring my friend in States that S'pore crime rates is still kept minimum after a house assault last week when this bugger went killing one of the professors in NUS. Stupid b**t**d. It might sound terrorism act to some. When this bugger just walk in and slice your throat with a pen-knife. i can only sympatise with the professor's family and friends.

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Cancer Today:
"Don't count on getting help from others today. Go do it alone. Someone may think that you like them more than you do. "

Qiang's Today's Chinese Proverb:
"If you wish to know the mind of a man, listen to his words

Click [Here] to check other horoscopes.

cherri cherri lady

That's Geri in grey and Candice in black.

Had another crazy night on last Sat. We drove to the Jalan Kayu to eat prata. it wasn't difficult to find where to sit cos there's a whole table of girls. Little that we knew that Kel knew one of the guys & his gf who came along and sat among the bed of roses. Went off to Kranji Turf Club. Didn't really went in. Went Zouk in the end. Dance all the way to 4am. We had our cheap thrill at Jelita Complex, something to cool off from 7-11 and "True or Dare" game. The pictures taken for the game didn't went thru due to XCB(Xiaoqiang Censorship Board). Kel puked followed by jeremy followed by me. dammit. Then we had a straight 3 hours tennis game. With Jon & Candice joinin us this time.

Just watched a Korean movie," my tutor friend". It's really funny. Should catch it.

think there's something wrong with xanga. it took forever for my com to load the page. helo? i running on SCV, this shouldn't be happening to me.

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xiaoqiang's thought last night:

also playing Air Supply~ Can't fight this feeling anymore.

ROAD TRIP

had a long crazy night last night. Thanx to Lip & Jolene who brought back my draw-string pants from thailand. had a kopi session at kopi ji (coffee bean) at bugis with Roger, lip & Jolene and Jon Boey. just a reminder, don't take 61 to holland v. it's a SUPER long trip. I felt like i touring around south of singapore.

met up with Jeremy and Wanrong for late dinner at Holland V. Wanrong, in case you are reading this blog of mine, you can always ask me or jeremy for help/ advice for doing the website or things regarding HTML codes. I am not a pro but i can always help to search for solutions. And i'm loved to share with others what i knew. Perhaps you knew something which i don't know too. Like i am still an amateur tennis player. Don't listen to Jeremy. i am not that pro.

Back to what i did last night. Have a really really long night. this is what happened. Called adrian but he wasn't at his hall. After sending Wanrong back, We went down to Devils' Bar. Jeremy was there to check the crowds. The funny thing, we missed 2 turns to town before we reached the place. The queue was super long when we reached there. Jeremy decided to abandon his friends to accompany me. orr~so sweet . Went Plaza Singapura to watch movies. No show. Headed down to Oasis for supper. That's like 1+am in the morning. oh~ did i mention i had late dinner again? Had Taiwan Porridge, cockles, frog legs, fried onion eggs, fried promfret and chilli kang kong. the cockles is bloody red, chilled not to mention fresh. Had "gui ling gao" to suppress the heatiness we had before. took a stroll along stadium waterfront. it's a really nice place if u guys want to bring ur loved ones there. It's quiet, peaceful and Pebbles Bay looked beautiful above the waters potraying a mirage image. Unlit Suntec skyline also form a nice silhouette with the misty moon.

Then chatted at my carpark before sped off to Tuas. It looked abit scary when you see no cars in front of you, no cars behind you; along PIE. You know, "Disney Fest" is still on. we couldn't get into Raffles Marina cos the car has no vehicle pass. the trip from my place to SAFTI is 23.6km. Stopped at Caltex (again) for nature call. We joking on the way that there will only be 19 rounds of salutes instead of the usual 21 for this year National Day. Cos both of us had one each . wahahahha.

Picked up Kel, Geri( i think her named spelled like that, not jeremy's gf) and Steve at zouk. that was like 4am in the morning. Both latters were gone. Geri started to puke in Jeremy's car. Steve puked when we reach geri's place. luckily, we had plastic bags from Caltex. Anyway, something wonderful... something amazing is going on today. i am not talking about National Day. heheh..wish you had wonderful time, kel.

In conclusion, we passed NUS 4 times. Jeremy missed 4 turns. i passed my camp twice. Lost to a Benz cos of taxi. 2 rounds of salute. And Happy 38th birthday, Singapore.

true love episode 3 is available now at [tokidoki] or you can click [here] to direct you there.

BOO~

Had a game of tennis(again) at SICC..Boy i sucks at it. Couldn't blamed it on swimming earlier on either. Just couldn't get the shots right. off to watch Jeremy's sparring at his fencing thingy. his opponent is actually a lady. Why are we there? wahahha~ of course to see the chio bu(s) he claimed there. Actually i was thinking perhaps the coach was thinking to let the lady to boast her morale when sparring the newbie, Jeremy. Kel came later. Well, i got bored and gotten Jon to took some photos with me. And it came up quite funny. i shall leave the rest of the photos to jeremy. Went for late dinner. met Clara & her bf.

check the picture above. do you notice something weird? the neon words on the right signboard is upside down. this makan place is somewhere near katong.

Singapore Open at SICC

Had my 1st game of tennis at SICC ( Singapore Island Country Club) on monday with Mei, Dickson and Jeremy(my coach)and dinner at Siglap's Cafe Cartel. I am a tennis amateur. but it's fun once you got the trick. It's my 1st racket game in 4 years++ time. Serious, no joke. i used to play squash n badminton but the skills and techniques seems to deteoriate with time.

Took some pictures cafe cartel. Pick up Jon along the way. i remembered that i used to hang out with them at Siglap in the early poly days. always go for their F.O.C free flow of bread & butter and ice water. home was the final destination after dinner. my bum still hurts after the game thanx the splash at Mahalos.

nightfall by xiaoqiang

also playing Gabrielle ~ Out of reach<-click the the title to see the lyrics


should i or should i not
until end of time, i get no answer from god

amazed was i when i saw you that night,
nightfall was the colour i saw in your eyes.
no words can describle how i feel,
even Venus couldn't help but sighs.

Wet Wet Wet

Went Big Splash at Mahalos. Still as fun as last time. But i think i'm abit too big for it. i refering to my size. Met up with Karen, Dickson, Jon, Vincent & Mei. But there's no sun and not many people.. Met up with Kel and Jeremy. Went Parkway Parade hawker centre to eat hawker food.. i really missed the food here.. It still taste as good as before..

Went down to town to catch Bad Boys 2 with Alex and a couple of their friends. Guys you should really catch the show . It's really good. Too bad it's R(A) though. i felt sorry for those under-aged. the journey down to town was damn funny with much harassing and caressing here and there; along with the music. No(don't worry)..we didn't did that to Karen. It's just with the boys. we were all gentlemen plus a man-whore.

Jeremy lost his car key after the show. We found it eventually. *phew*

What makes a man by xiaoqiang

Tell me what makes a man
Wanna give you all his heart
Smile when you're around
And cry when you're apart
If you know what makes a man
Wanna love you the way I do
Girl you gotta let me know
So I can get over you

Other girls would come along they always do
But what's the point if all I ever want is you

Compensate for not going to ZOUKout

Went to Jeff's NTU hall 8 Bash in Boom Boom Room at Far East Square last thurs. Didn't really like TOP 40s music. But the show put up by in-house people is very entertaining.

Went Zouk for both nights. Friday crowd was superb. Music is good. Members' was packed. super packed. the funny thing is that on friday night, members' is the only place that's packed, not the dancefloor not other bar counters. Saw Geri too.. poor ger, jus came back and flying off todae again. Thanx to her elbow which hit directly at my bellybutton. it sent minor electric shocks when she hit me. Met Nick's friend, Shelly. She told me i looked so Brandon. "huh?" Then all 3 of us was talking about names. so Friday night 1st Aug, my name was Brandon. ONLY ONE FRIDAY.

Went to Zouk last tonight. It's was kinda strange when i entered ZOuk. I had a feeling i came to the wrong place. the crowd looked abit funny. music was okie.Had abit much of vodka last night. Met Evangeline. you can tell Ronald's hair is displaced when you saw him last night. Met Vincent & Mei outside Winebar chilling away. Left for Liquidroom. sometimes i really wondered, why Liquidroom has better music and better crowd. Met lotsa lotsa of people there. Had a chilling out session at one hotel's room in Keong Saik St after partying. Chit-chat till morning. Came home about 7+ to say hi to my dad when i opened the door. I felt like a parasite pestering Candice though..."can we go?" "can we go?" "can we go?" "can we go?" i'm felt very apologetic now. By the way, the hotel room is really really cool.

As u can guess from the time i posted today. i've only slept like a few hours only. maybe it's my bio clock that tick off at 12. Frankly speaking i felt abit high for not enough sleep...maybe i should go catch my beauty sleep later..